Parental Unit Day – Father Figure Version

So as many know it was Father's Day here in North America this past Sunday, and if it hadn't been for all the posts wishing father-like figures a happy day, it would have gone right past me. I'm surprised at myself and not. Since cutting my own father out of my life to save my …

Well that takes some of the pressure off!

So I have finally, after 8 months of unemployment stress, landed a new job. It came as a bit of a shock, to be honest, I thought for that particular interview I had completely blown it and kind of wrote it off as a lost opportunity. Apparently, they felt differently. When the HR manager called …

When panic strikes

So yeah, I've been less than a little delinquent with keeping up on my blog. As much as I know that writing is one of the things that can help me cope with my bipolar disorder and get the whirling thoughts out of my brain and dumped somewhere useful, I find it hard to sometimes …

Performance Anxiety

So I have a show tomorrow night and the steady waves of nervousness have been washing over me for the last couple of days. Seriously, I can get nervous for a show a good week before a performance - that's usually when it hits me that what I've been playing at in my den for …

Purpose

One big part of being unemployed is feeling the lack of purpose. Oh sure, there's housework that can be done and errands to run but a truly, overarching purpose? Not so much. I've been doing some casual freelance for a former manager (who doesn't have the budget to hire me full-time - bugger!) and I …

The Jinx Factor

I'm a big believer in the jinx factor. That means I fear sharing good news in case it blows up in my face. Seriously, I rarely if ever share any news that's positive unless I am 100%, signed, sealed and delivered sure it's a done thing. This is very frustrating for those around me at …

The Mourning Process

I can hardly believe it's been a whole 5 months since I was booted from the best job I ever had thanks to a really bad year for me mental health-wise. While angry at how the company handled my dismissal (so soon really after returning to work full-time and becoming productive and happy in my …

Who needs sleep?

Sleep has been an elusive entity again lately. It's been sporadic and my usual tricks to get to sleep or back to sleep when I wake up aren't working anymore. I tried melaleuca, and it was working famously, but after a few weeks I felt odd, and worried it was interfering with my other meds. …

All hail the sloth!

Today is the first day I've been up and about in three days. The entire weekend, including Friday, I was in my bed in my pjs, just napping, reading, and doing some meditations. I just had no energy or desire to get up and out, didn't even feel like doing any dance practice and I …

Spinning thoughts

My brain is having a hard time today. My anxiety has been peaking since I woke up this morning and I've taken what I lovingly call my emergency pills to try to get the thundering in my chest to slow down. It's not helping that it's a cloudy, rainy day today. I do have dance …